This month's guest is none other than my beautiful sister in love -- Marshelle Hood! I can truly say after being sisters (via marriage for five years [and counting..!] plus the dating stages) she lives out the concepts she writes to you about today! She has been a great example of what woman learning to love herself, love her husband + son should look like! If you have the pleasure of knowing her IRL (in real life) -- then you know she's a treasure! Tribe Members, please welcome (as we call her) Shelle...
For much of my forty-one years of life, I’ve heard a lot of talk about love + how it is to be properly done in the form of giving it to someone else. Even growing up in a Christian home, I learned about scriptures in the Bible that talked about love. “Love is patient, love is kind, love keeps no record of wrong, etc… (1 Corinthians 13)”, but I was always taught to apply this type of love towards someone else. It wasn’t until I started running out of love that I began to ask the question, “What about loving myself?”
Every time I sit on an airplane to travel, there is a specific safety measure that has help me throughout my adult life.
“Oxygen and the air pressure are always being monitored. In the event of a decompression, an oxygen mask will automatically appear in front of you. To start the flow of oxygen, pull the mask towards you. Place it firmly over your nose + mouth, secure the elastic band behind your head + breathe normally. Although the bag does not inflate, oxygen is flowing to the mask. If you are travelling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask on first + then assist the other person. Keep your mask on until a uniformed crew member advises you to remove it.”
If you are travelling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask on first + then assist the other person. I call this the oxygen mask effect. When it comes to love, I can’t effectively love others until I can effectively love myself. Do I give everyone else my time, support + attention, while I just keep all my feelings + needs to myself? Do I constantly buy for my husband, son, family + friends, while I don’t even treat myself to a Starbuck’s Venti Caramel Macchiato with extra whip cream?
What does it mean to love yourself? I used to get this confused with being cocky, arrogant or prideful + yes, there can be a slippery slope into these characteristics if balanced isn’t maintained. But, over time I had to apply the concepts I learned about loving others to now also loving myself.
Love is patient: Some things take time in life. Even when personal goals in life are realistic and attainable, sudden change can happen to cause delay. Just like the change in airplane cabin pressure requires the oxygen mask, life changes require the patience mask. A new area where I’m learning to love myself through patience is with exercising. My body now doesn’t bounce back from a five-mile run as quick as it did when I was younger. Now, instead of getting frustrated about it, I just use it as a reason to take an extra-long shower.
Love is kind: It is okay to be kind + treat yourself. Doing things for yourself does not make you selfish. Saying nice things about yourself does not make you conceited. Many times, we want others to show us love through these acts of kindness + when they don’t do it, we are disappointed and even heartbroken. Is this because we have placed the oxygen mask on others before we placed it on ourselves first?
Love keeps no record of wrong: Constantly looking back at mistakes + failures will hinder any forward progression in life. We’re not perfect + mistakes will be made. Learn how to forgive yourself + let it go. Many times, that’s easier said than done + it doesn’t happen right away, so in these times, go back to love is patient. ☺
Love always hopes and perseveres: Dream for the biggest, hope for the highest + persevere for the greatest of your life. Don’t “dumb” yourself down for anyone or anything in life. Don’t ever feel like your life is meant to be less than. As long as there is breath in your body, there is hope + an opportunity to love yourself. SEE the best IN yourself + BE the best FOR yourself.
In the words of a Meghan Trainor’s song, “I Love Me”; I don’t mean to brag, I don’t mean to boast. I love all y’all, but I love me the most.
You can keep up with Marshelle here...
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